The first man shoved the first apple up his ass, but on the second he winced and was eaten by the cannibals.
Then the second man returned with ten berries. He inserted the first nine without making a sound, but on the tenth he suddenly burst out laughing and was eaten by the cannibals.
The two dead men met up in heaven. The first said: "Why did you laugh on the tenth berry - you were almost home?"
"I know," he said, "but I saw the third guy coming with an armful of pineapples!"

 Two cannibals were eating dinner. One said: "I really hate my sister." The other said: "Well, just eat the noodles."

 Did you hear about the cannibal student who was suspended from school for buttering up his teacher?

 And have you heard about the cannibal restaurant where dinner costs an arm and a leg?

 A man was captured by cannibals. "What," asked the cannibal chief, licking his lips, "was your job before you were captured?"
"I was a newspaper man," came the reply.
"An editor?"
"No, merely a sub-editor."
"Cheer up. Promotion awaits you. After dinner you will be editor-in-chief."

 It had been a trying few months for two cannibals. Food had been scarce, so when they finally caught and killed a missionary, each was determined to have his fair share. Finally they agreed that they should start eating from opposite ends of the missionary's body and meet in the middle. That way they would both get equal portions.
After a while, the guy starting from the head asked the other one: "How are you doing down there?"
"I'm having a ball."
"No, no, you're eating too fast!"