Elephants 121
[ A little guy was sitting at a bar
staring at his drink forages. Then
suddenly a burly biker came along,
snatched the glass and drank the
contents.
The biker laughed his head off. "So what
you gonna do about that, little man?" he
crowed.
"Nothing," sighed the little man
despondently. "You see, today's been the
worst day of my life. First, I overslept
and was late for an important meeting.
My boss was so angry he fired me. So I
cleared my desk but when I went to my
car, I found it had been stolen. So I
got a cab home but after paying the
driver, I realized that I'd left my
wallet in the back of the cab. I went
into my house and found my wife in bed
with the gardener. So I left home and
came to this bar. And just when I was
thinking about ending it all, you came
along and drank my poison ..."
Elephants
What do you call two elephants on a
bicycle? -Optimistic.
How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? - Footprints in the
butter.
hide in a dish of M & Ms/Smarties.
Why did the elephant paint his toenails different colours? - So he could
[ Why didn't the elephant cross the
road? - Because he didn't want to be
mistaken for a chicken.
How do you get down from an elephant? - You don't, you get down from a
duck.
What did Tarzan say when he saw 500 elephants coming over the hill? -
"Look, there's 500 elephants coming over
the hill."
What did Tarzan say when he saw 500 elephants in sunglasses coming over
the hill? - Nothing, he didn't recognize
them.
How do you know if there's an elephant under your bed? - Your nose is
touching the ceiling.
How do you know if there's an elephant in your bed? - By the "E" on his
pyjamas.
|
Short Jokes listed in alphabet
order |
|
|
|
|
