Humor   A -Z

11 * ARMED FORCES

The man turned out to be the village idiot. "This is the most wonderful marksmanship I've ever seen," said the Army man. "How in the world do you do it?"

"Easy as pie. 1 shoot first and draw the circle afterwards:'

52. "Now watch out for the colonel, because he's coming to inspect the post," said the sergeant, as he marched off and left O'Brien to his first outpost duty. After an hour the sergeant returned. "Colonel been here yet?" he asked.

O'Brien saying "No," the sergeant again departed for an

hour, returning with the same query.

Then, at last, the colonel did appear.

"Do you know who I am" he asked O'Brien. "Shure, an' 1 don't at all," replied the recruit. "I am the colonel."

"Faith, an' you'll catch it, then! The sergeant's been asking for you twice already."

53. The lady was not aware that her drive had carried her into an army maneuvers area. As she approached a small bridge, a sentry stopped her and said, "Sorry, but you can't drive across this bridge. It has just been demolished." Leaving her dumbfounded, for the bridge was in perfect repair, he walked off.

As she sat pondering the possibility that the sentry was insane, another soldier approached. "Young man," she asked, "can you tell me any reason why 1 can't cross that bridge?"

"Lady," he replied soberly, "I can't tell you a thing. I've been dead for two days."

54. Two harassed-looking privates were staggering across the barrack square from the direction of the kitchens with a huge steaming cauldron slung between them. The most officious, most interfering officer in the whole regiment spotted them from his window and straightaway sallied forth. "Hi, there-you men put that down." They did so. "Get me a ladle," ordered the officer. "B-b-but, sir--" stammered one of the privates. "Don't