Humor   A -Z


c

CARD-PLAYING * 28

"Hah!" she cried. "Three o'clock! I suppose you're going to tell me you've been out somewhere holding a sick friend's hand."

"Well," said the man sadly, "if I had been holding his hand, we'd be a lot richer tonight!"

124. Three patients in a hospital ward were reprimanded severely for playing poker. As a final gesture, the nurse confiscated the deck of cards.

Later, one of the patients went down the floor and collected the medical charts from the beds. He returned, shuffled the charts, and dealt them out. ''I've got a pair," he said, laying down two appendectomies.

''I've got that beat," replied the second patient, showing a full house-tonsillectomies over fractured legs.

The third patient chuckled softly. "It looks like I win," he said. ''I've got a royal flush." He laid down his charts-five enemas.

125. An American tourist home from Formosa told how one night he decided to kill a little time playing poker with three wealthy Chinese. As he spoke no Chinese, and the almond-eyed brothers no English, they got an interpreter. All went quietly for a while, but in due course the American was dealt a four-card flush and bet a hundred dollars.

At this, the Chinese gentleman next to him exclaimed, "Ah moy," which the interpreter explained meant he raised a hundred. The next Chinese announced, "Ah foy," and the interpreter said, "He raises you two hundred more:' The third Chinese grunted, "Ah goy," which the interpreter explained as another hundred raise.

In spite of the competition the American decided to stay with the pot, and drew his one card. Noting that he had failed to fill his flush, he cried, "Ah phooey," at which the Chinese all threw down their hands.

"Nice going, mister," cried the interpreter, slapping him on the back. "Your million dollar bluff won the pot."