At
a conference on the supernatural, one of the
speakers asked, 'Who here has seen a ghost?'
Most
hands went up. 'And how many of you have had
some form of interaction with a ghost?' About
half
the hands remained up. 'Okay, now how many of
you have had physical contact with a ghost?'
Three
hands stayed up, and there was a slight munmur
in
the crowd.
'Well, that's very interesting. Let me ask if
any of
you have. how shall I put this. been intimate
with a
ghost.' One hand stayed up. The speaker was
astonished. 'Sir, are you telling us that you've
actually had sexual liaison with a ghost?'
The guy with his hand up suddenly looked
embarrassed and said, 'Oh, I'm sorry, I thought
you
said goat.'
"Two dogs are in a vet's waiting room, Each
eyes
the other with a combination of suspicion and
sympathy.
'What are you here for?' the first dog asks.
'Well, 1 was feeling really bad the other day.
And
my master's six-year-old started bugging me. I
tried
to ignore the little shit, but was feeling so
rotten
that I bit his hand off.'
'I know exactly how you must have felt. So why
are you here?'
'Well, they reckon I'm too vicious so I'm going
to
be ... you know ... I'm going to be desexed.'
'Oh dear, I'm sorry.'
'So, what are you in here for?'
'Oh, nothing really.'
'Go on, tell me. It'll take my mind off the
operation.'
'Okay, well it's like this. The bitch next door
was
in heat and I was feeling really randy. Then my
mistress came into the kitchen wearing a short
skirt
and no underwear and when she bent over to put
some dog food in my bowl I just couldn't
resist.'
'So you're here for the operation too?'
'No. I'm here to have my nails clipped.'
|
LATEST JOKES 