THE SHOE
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One evening after work, a man drove his secretary
home after she had a little too much to drink at a
party. Although nothing happened, he decided not to
mention it to his wife. Later that night, the man
and his wife were driving to a movie when he spotted
a high-heeled shoe hidden under the passenger seat.
Pointing to something out the passenger window to
distract his wife, he picked up the shoe and tossed
it out of his window.
They arrived at the theater a short time later
and were about to get out of the car when his wife
asked, "Honey, have you seen my other shoe?"
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Chuck Norris Jokes
Chuck
Norris does not sleep. He waits.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck
Norris, you may be only seconds away from death.
It is believed dinosaurs are extinct due to a giant meteor. That's true if
you want to call Chuck Norris a giant meteor.
Chuck Norris does not follow fashion trends, they
follow him. But then he turns around and kicks their
ass. Nobody follows Chuck Norris. |
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THE CHINAMAN
A little old Chinese man goes into Nick's Greek Food
Cafe. Nick goes to the old man's table and asks what
he'd like.
The old man says, "One order of clacked clab, prease."
The hair on Nick's neck stood up but he took the
order and
served the man. Every night for 3 years, the same
thing....one night the old man comes in and orders .
Nick couldn't take it any longer and says, "listen,
it's one order of cracked
crab,please. got that? Now leave and don't come back
till you can say that!!
Months go by and one night Nick looks over and
there's the little Chinese man at his usual table.
Nick walks over and asks him what he'd like, the
little Chinese man looked Nick in the eye and says,
"I'd like one order of cracked crab...you Gleek
plick!" |
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10 signs your kid is a nerd
10. Likes people who oppress him: teachers, parents,
principals, police and authority figures.
9. Is overly enthusiastic about 'Dungeons and
Dragons' and other role playing games.
8. Very familiar with megahertz, wears glasses and
can quote scripture.
7. Frequently speaks of martial arts, but still gets
beaten up.
6. Says 'whom' instead of 'who.'
5. Is pleased when disruptive individuals are sent
to the office, so that they can continue with there
learning.
4. Prefers NPR to any music.
3. Gets upset when there is a test or quiz that he
did not know about.
2. Rooted for Deep-Blue in the famous chess game.
1. Must be pulled off bridge when not accepted at
the college of his choice.
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LATEST JOKES 