Inter sex two guys want to buy two tickets to Pittsburgh. They go to the ticket counter and notice that the ticket agent is very, very beautiful, with large breasts and prominent nipples. Fixating on them they say, 'We'd like two pickets to Tittsburgh.' Overwhelmed with embarrassment, they run away and don't know what to do. Then they see a priest walking by and explain that, for reasons they can't articulate. they're unable to buy two tickets to Pittsburgh. Can he help them? He immediately agrees, walks up to the counter and, like the boys, can't help but notice the magnificent mammary glands and the prominent nipples. Nonetheless he manages to say, 'I'd like to buy two tickets to Pittsburgh.' The woman behind the counter asks, 'And how would you like your change?' He says, 'In nipples and dimes.' "'he old couple were on a car trip. They stopped at a roadhouse for lunch and the old woman left her glasses on the table. She didn't miss them until they'd been driving for half an hour. The old man complained all the way back to the restaurant. When they finally arrived, as she was climbing out of the car to retrieve her specs, the old man said, 'While you're in there, you may as well get my hat, too.' "'he new bride was a bit embarrassed to be identified as a honeymooner. So when she and her new husband pulled up at the motel, she asked him if there was any way they could make it appear they'd been married a long time. 'Sure,' he said, 'you carry the suitcases.'