Best Lawyer Jokes  A woman and her little girl were visiting the grave of the little girl's grandmother. On their way back to the car, the little girl asked, 'Mummy, do they ever bury two people in the same grave?' 'Of course not, dear: replied the mother. 'Why would you think that?' 'The tombstone back there said "Here lies a lawyer and an honest man": "'he defendant who pleads his own case has a fool for a client, but at least there will be no problem with fee-splitting . two guys, George and Harry, set out in a hot air balloon to cross the Atlantic Ocean. After 37 hours in the air, George says, 'Harry, we better lose some altitude so we can see where we are.' Harry lets out some of the hot air in the balloon, and the balloon descends to below the cloud cover. George says, 'I still can't tell where we are. Let's ask that guy on the ground.' So Harry yells down to the man, 'Hey, could you tell us where we are?' And the man on the ground yells back, 'You're in a balloon, 100 feet up in the air.' George turns to Harry and says, That man must be a lawyer.' Harry says, 'How can you tell?' 'Because the advice he gave us is I00 per cent accurate, and totally useless.'