politically incorrect

   A guy was lost in the mall by the Washington Monument. He stopped a cop and asked, 'What side is the State Department on?' The cop answered, 'Ours, I hope.' A stockbroker in New York gets tired of his colleague's stories of going duck hunting each year. They boast of their prowess in the hunt and how many ducks they bag. Not to be outdone, he decides he's going hunting and buys the most expensive shotgun available. He spends a fortune on hunting clothes and gear, gets his license and sets off. After an exasperating day of tromping through the marshes and briars without seeing a single duck, he heads back to his car. On the way he sees a duck fly overhead. He raises his gun, blazes away at it and actually hits it. The duck falls into a nearby farmyard. As the hunter starts to climb over the fence to retrieve his kill, he's confronted by a farmer who says, 'Where in the hell do you think you're going, city boy?' 'I'm going to get my duck.' 'My property, my duck,' says the farmer. 'Oh come on, I've been out here all day and that's the only duck I've seen. I shot it. It's my duck.' The farmer again says, 'My property, my duck.' They argue for a few minutes and finally the farmer says, 'I'll tell you what. We'll settle this country-style.' 'What's that?' the stockbroker asks warily. 'Well, I'll kick you in the balls as hard as I can and then you kick me in the balls as hard as you can, and we keep this up and the last man standing keeps the duck.' Not wanting to return empty-handed, the stockbroker finally agrees. The farmer, wearing heavy work boots, kicks the guy in the balls with all his might. The stockbroker's eyes roll back in his head as he coughs and wheezes and struggles to stay on his feet. Composing himself somewhat, he says to the farmer, 'Okay, now it's my turn.' The farmer replies, 'You can have the duck.'