Parties
 A preacher decided to call on a member of his church one Friday night, but arrived to find a party in full swing. On entering the house, he saw a circle of naked men with blindfolded women moving from man to man, fondling their genitals in an attempt to guess their identity.
The embarrassed preacher turned to the host and said: "I'm sorry, I don't think I'd fit in here right now."
"Nonsense," said the host. "Your name's been called three times already!"

 What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking: "Gosh, if we have a party, there may not be enough
standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too." [JERRY SEINFELD]

 A man tried to gatecrash a fancy dress party at a city centre bar. He was dressed as a pair of jump leads. After a bit of an argument, the bouncer on the door said: "All right, you can go in, so long as you don't start anything."

 A man went to a friend's fancy dress party with nothing but a girl on his back.
"What have you come as?" asked his friend. "A snail."
"How can you be a snail when all you've got is that girl on your back?" "That's not a girl - that's Michelle."
People not to invite to your party:

 Your parents.

 The local chapter of Hell's Angels.

A delegation of Russian fishermen.

 Bill Clinton.

 Members of the temperance society.

 Members of a manic depressives' support group

Short Jokes listed in alphabet order
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