Politics
 Hillary Clinton was out walking near the White House one day when she
saw a young boy trying to sell a litter of tiny puppies.
"My, they're so cute," said the First Lady. "And they're all Democrats," replied the boy.
"Is that so?" said Hillary. "I tell you, I'm so taken with these puppies that i you've got one left at the weekend, I'm going to buy one."
The following weekend, Hillary passed the same spot and saw the boy with just two puppies left. "I'd like to buy one," she said. "How much?"
"Fifty dollars each," said the boy. "They're both Republicans."
"Wait a minute," snapped Hillary. "The other day you said they were Democrats."
"Well, yes, ma'am," answered the boy. "But since then they've opened their eyes."

 Too bad all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving
cabs and cutting hair. [GEORGE BURNS]

If Presidents don't do it to their wives, they do it to the country. [MEL
BROOKS]

 A bus load of politicians was speeding along a country road when it ploughed into a tree and overturned. There was blood and glass everywhere. An old farmer saw the crash and was first on the scene. Within two hours, he had dug a huge hole and buried all the politicians.
A few days later, the local sheriff was passing through when he saw the wreckage of the bus. The farmer explained what had happened.
"Were they all dead?" inquired the sheriff.
"Well," said the farmer. "Some of them said they weren't, but you know how them politicians lie."

 Now I know what a statesman is; he's a dead politician. We need more
statesmen. [BOB EDWARDS]

 

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